Pulp Diction: Beware of doggerel

The following piece of doggerel is dedicated to those who have confessed to being unable to read my blog without a dictionary. . .

Pulp Diction

Please don’t report me to your local constabulary
But sometimes I just like to flex my vocabulary
When I’m trying to convey something slightly spectacular
I can’t be content with the common vernacular
I don’t mean to sound debonair or duplicitous
I simply insist that my words are felicitous
Your pardon I beg for coming off as imperious
It’s a penchant of mine, all pedantic and serious
I’ve been called ostentatious and many things worse
In language too coarse to include in this verse
My only response is to maintain my mettle
Not be stymied by childish prattle
I’ve faced every form of intransigent static
But still I stand firm self-assured and phlegmatic